Separate yourself and reevaluate who you are. I know women who have been living with their boyfriends for 4, 6, even 10 years, and still without an engagement! Sweetie, not all men are these natural leaders. He needs to know that you can live without him and be fine. I also think a lot of the divorce rate and think why ruin what works. In this situation, I greatly feel you have abandoned your autonomy, you r self sufficiency and your independence for this notion, this ideal of marriage with this one particular man. Dear Patricia, Oh geez…. If you really want to make this relationship work, you need to regain your self control, and find your individualism as whatever cost. Take up hobbies outside of him, join a gym, go back to school.. To a man there really is not much more.
To a man there really is not much more. Add on to that, the longer this drags on for, the more bored he gets in the relationship and the less attractive you become to him. Because as time goes on and you live together every day, you start falling into a routine and, naturally, you become more dull and predictable to him. You may be pleasantly surprised by what you find.. Sweetie, YOU need to know you can live without him. Its been 5 Years! In fact, a true leader boils down to the character of the individual, not the gender. For relationships to be successful, the woman should be a little smarter than the man, and always be a step ahead. And really shame on your boyfriend for not telling you what he really wants. I know women who have been living with their boyfriends for 4, 6, even 10 years, and still without an engagement! Take up hobbies outside of him, join a gym, go back to school.. And it come out in unattractive ways, perhaps you start bitching at him or nagging him, get upset with him if he wants to take a trip without you or have a boys night, or question him about his intentions and ask him when his time-frame is for getting married. I admit that I am in your exact situation and I often wonder if maybe what DeAnna said is true but when I think about it I am so happy I have lived with my boyfriend. Maybe even get your own place and try to start over with him. In fact the last one was a 7 year relationship of which 5 years they lived together. He needs to know that you can live without him and be fine. The last several wedding I have been to have been couples who lived together and actually been together for over 5 years. It was actually a hard adjustment and we have really gotten to know each other better. Dear DeAnna, Please help. Dear Patricia, Oh geez…. The best modern relationships are those that offer a healthy balance of learning, freedom and teaching, so that you know how o balance being a couple and maintaining your own individuality as people. And the older you get and the more time that passes, the more impatient you become and insecure you feel about the situation. Then once we live with each other for a while, the next step is marriage! Plus whatever else you may do for him like cook and clean or do his laundry. Do you think he will soon? Reader Question of the Week:
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